Airport Memories
In the 18 months I have lived in Phoenix I have had 15 flights out of Sky Harbor Airport. I’ve never been a big traveler (fiscal realities of working at Blockbuster for five years) but it’s a bit of a bummer living in Phoenix so I often find myself taking off for the weekend. These trips are usually to my home town of Santa Rosa, Ca for either holidays, birthdays or boredom. Due to 9/11 one must arrive two hours early for a flight, which is the main way the Al Queda has affected my life, and I find myself killing a lot of time. For the most part I would find myself in a bar & grill enjoying a beer and a smoke before takeoff but Arizona outlawed smoking indoors on May 1st so now I catchup on my reading.
Despite flying Southwest exclusively (I had one flight on United. I got to Reno ok but they canceled the return flight due to a little bit of snow and I had to grab a last minute Southwestern flight to get back) I’ve had good experiences for the most part despite being treated like livestock but I am also cheap so I expect such service. My last two trips out of Phoenix, both to Santa Rosa, led to the uncomfortable celebrity spotting.
Last month I grabbed an Saturday morning flight to Oakland and due to over sleeping I grabbed an Arizona Cardinals hat on my way out the door to compensate for my disheveled appearance. Stuck at in line at Southwest I noticed a large dude about five or six spots ahead of me. I say large as in he was all muscle and suffered from Trinidad Hubbard Syndrome (i.e. shirt size too small to show off muscles). I didn’t think to much of him and returned to listening to my Ipod and zoning out. After checking in my luggage I hustled to security in hopes of not missing my flight and the same dude was now behind me. While waiting to get searched and humiliated (26″ waist and removing my belt leads to partial strip session) I finally realized he is former Arizona Cardinals wide receiver coach, Richie Anderson. Anderson had been fired about a month before after being arrested for soliciting a prostitute. A part of me was tempted to give him a pow and show my support but he seemed a bit miffed at my Cardinals hat so I returned to looking at the ceiling. I only recognized Anderson due to his recent mug shot on the local news.
Yesterday I found myself running late for my return flight to Phoenix. I got lost trying to find Sacramento airport and once again made a dash to the gate. While walking to the end of the security line and a likely 15-minute wait I noticed a short dude half hiding his face with a baseball hat. I continued walking to my spot and half glanced at him again and he stared right back. I realized it was Ashy Larry (Donnell Rawlings from Chappelle’s Show) and that he seemed a bit irked that I was staring at him. The look was enough to dissuade any chance of getting a pic with him.
In my regular Life In The DPC I never run into anyone vaguely famous, Christian Okoye and Marcus Allen at 2:00 am on a Sunday in Reno aside. Even when away from my local airports (Oakland, SFO, Sky Harbor, Reno and Sac) there is still the possibility of seeing Sinbad grabbing his luggage at O’Hare while my brother made sure I wasn’t hallucinating due to fatigue.
Pacman (Fever) Update 11.0
To my amazement there are others out there that believe Pacman Jones is getting the shaft from the NFL. BringPacmanBack.com shares this sentiment and they are using their site to get the word out that Pacman and his one year are too much. With regards to diplomacy the site also shows the both sides of the issue.
There is one sentiment throughout the forum; NFL Czar has cast Pacman as guilty until proven otherwise and the media has nailed Pacman before the justice can run its course. No one ever said Pacman was a saint but he has the right to a trial and the NFL the public at large needs to remember this. Once again there is no justice on stolen land.
100?
Devin Hester is now the fastest man in the history of the NFL. At least he is according to Madden ‘08 where his speed is listed at 100 (1-99 scale). No player in Madden history has hit the century mark in any category. At this point Hester is now faster than his mentor Deion Sanders, who has one of the fastest electronically timed 40 at 4.29. Fabian Washington has the current record at 4.25.
“Deion has told me a bunch of times that I was as fast as he was,” Hester said after the announcement.
It is well documented that I am a Hester fan. He is the rare player that you always watch when he gets the ball because you have no idea what could happen but he is not the fastest player I’ve seen.
I believe that his mentor, amongst others, are fastest than the Windy City Flyer but in his defense Hester’s football speed is near the top. With that said here are the men faster than Hester, in no particular order.
1. Deion Sanders
2. Randy Moss
3. Bo Jackson
4. Tim Dwight
5. Gale Sayers
6. Bullett Bob Hayes
7. Willie Gault
8. Darrell Green
9. Reggie Bush
10. Michael Vick
Pacman (Fever) 10.0
The NFL has delayed its decision on the suspension of Pacman Jones. Jones’ attorney is summarizing their appeal in writing and will be reviewed by NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. Goodell has maintained a new sheriff in town mentality towards the recent increase in NFL off the field troubles. At this point Jones is trying to have his suspension reduced to anything less than the entire 2007 season.
Would I want Pacman on my team? Yes, I had many theories on how the Bears could use a man of his talents but ultimately he is the rare shutdown corner. His special team skills are also at a high level but lets keep in mind there is always Devin Hester. Truthfully Pacman will be dumped by the Titans and he will be scooped up in a moment. It stands to reason that he will clean up his act for the remained of his NFL career.
Randomness: The Bears announced that they are moving Hester to offense. From the few times I saw him play defensive back last year it is apparent that his talent are with the ball in his hands. I think the experiment can work and I did the same thing in Madden ‘07. He is fourth on the wide receiver depth chart. Keep in mind that this also the same squad that has Pacman and Hester returning kick offs.
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Number Three With A Bullet
Scarlett Johansson finished third in Maxim’s Hot 100, which hits newsstands in June. Johansson was preceded by Jessica Alba and Lindsey Lohan. Lohan knocked off two time defending champ Eva Longoria who fell to ninth.
Past winners
- Eva Longoria (2006 & 2005)
- Jessica Simpson (2004)
- Christina Aguilera (2003)
- Jennifer Garner (2002)
- Jessica Alba (2001)
DEI: Post Dale Earnhardt Jr.
Dale Earnhardt Jr. announced that he is leaving Dale Earnhardt Incorporated after the 2007 season. The often tumultuous contract negotiations between Earnhardt Jr. and his step mom Teresa have been turned into NASCAR’s most popular drama and have fallen apart. Earnhardt Jr. has been adament that he would return to the company founded by his father if he was given a controllling fiscal interest and total control over racing endeavors. Teresa Earnhardt is the owner of DEI after Dale Sr’s death and has been less than charmed by NASCAR’s most popular driver.
Junior’s reasons for leaving the team, founded by his father to enable Junior to pursue a NASCAR career, can only be speculated upon but likely include:
- To be competitive for a championship. His squad has fallen away from the leaders of the pack the last few seasons. One must speculate on Teresa’s dedication to winning as opposed to the Earnhardt golden goose.
- Teresa isn’t Junior’s mom. There has always been tension between the two and it stands to reason this didn’t help contract negotiations, specifically Junior’s desire for total control.
- DEI’s racing equipment has been under fire for less than stellar performance and for the most part the cars have been designed to exorcise the demons of restrictor plate racing for Dale Sr.
- He’s 32-years old and his window to win a title is starting to close and DEI is nowhere near providing him the opportuity to do so. He has the fame and cash but one can speculate that it might be a hollow existence without a championship. Think Alex Rodriguez jetting from Texas to New York to put himself in a position to win.
- Junior now has the opportunity to race the black number 3 Chevy for Richard Childress Racing, Dale Sr’s former employer. RCR would welcome Junior with open arms to continue the Earnhardt (3?) legacy and there is a possibility that the number 3 would be brought back for Junior. From an ethical standpoint he is the only driver that can claim the right to it and the amount of revenue it would generate could fund a third world nation.
Pacman (Fever) Update 9.0
Pacman Jones’ attorney has outlined the case for the martyred defensive back that is meeting with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodel on Friday to appeal his one year suspension. Jones’ attorney main point is that 283 NFL players have been arrested since 2000 and none have been handed a one year suspension.
For a copy of the letter sent to the NFL click here
300
Do you like gladiator movies, Bobby?
My brother brought me a copy of 300 from his Mexican odyssey. I haven’t figured out if it was a souvenir or because he got back on my birthday. Anywho, it seems that that Mexico is buffet of pirated movies that are still in the theatre. The copy I got of 300 has cover art that seems to be on point with the actual DVD release that should be out in a few months. Of course most of it is written in Spanish but the overall tone transcends language.
In my mind I knew what I was getting into with 300. Frank Miller penned the original story, I knew it was a gladiator flick and all the women I work with were stoked when it came out. The latter is the dead give away that this movie, though violent, is geared towards women or gay men. Much in the same way Gladiator was marketed to hyper masculine men but became a different brand when it hit the screen. 
“Gladiator movies are a turn-on to gay men because of the hyper- masculinity of the heroes,” explains a member of the gay press. “The whole genre represents the most brazenly homoerotic entertainment Hollywood dares to offer.”
300 is like Gladiator but with better cinematography and an unknown cast. Essentially you have a bunch of dudes in good shape killing other dudes in equal shape. In all honesty I have a vague idea what the movie is about, I assume it is a different take on Rocky, but because I couldn’t figure how to turn off the Spanish subtitles I found myself trying to read and then translate. Unfortunately I flunked Spanish twice in college and my skills are on par with a three year old with a speech impediment. Actually I could probably watch the movie with no volume and in Spanish and get the essence of it.
I can’t say that 300 is a homo erotic adventure marketed as man’s action flick because, well, I didn’t write or direct it. If I am hunting for gay undertones I would look at Xerxes, the 7′ tall King of the Persians, as a direct tribute to RuPaul. Actually I thought it was RuPaul and left my brother a text message trying to confirm it but to no avail. I used simple logic in my casting assertion; when I see a very tall, dark skinned, genderless dude I assume it is RuPaul. At one 
point in my life I would have said Sylvester but RuPaul is taller and I am not sure where Sylvester is these days.
I was working at Blockbuster when Gladiator came out. For the most part it was rented by dudes that had a tendency to remark that it was a man’s movie. I assume these guys were straight because they were renting the flick with their wife/girlfriend in tow. Of course I usually confirmed their sentiments with a simple “yeah” and gave them their change. It seems to me that a crafty Hollywood guy could make movies that would ideally be for gay markets (Priscilla Queen of the Desert or It’s My Party) but make them vilolent with hyper-masculine themes and have a crossover hit. In theory no audience is excluded and all parties involved are satisfied but the ancient gladiator bit has been used too many times so maybe a cowboy movie…
Nevada’s Choice Cuts In The NFL
University of Nevada quarterback Jeff Rowe was drafted in the 5th round of the 2007 NFL Draft. For any Nevada alumnus NFL stardom is a long shot and Rowe has a tough road ahead of him before carving out his niche in the professional ranks. In light of the recent draft here is one man’s opinion of Nevada’s greatest contributions to the NFL.
1. Marion Motley (1940-42): The only University of Nevada player in the NFL Hall of Fame. Member of the NFL’s 75th Anniversary All-Time Team. Helped integrate professional football.
2. Charles Mann (1980-82): Four time Pro Bowler and three time Super Bowl champion with the Washington Redskins and San Francisco 49ers. Amassed 83 sacks in 12 seasons from his defensive end spot.
3. Brock Marion (1989-92): A 7th round draft pick by the Dallas Cowboys in 1993 went to three Pro Bowl in his 12 year career.
4. Frank Hawkins (1977-80): A member of the College Football Hall of Fame and played 7 seasons with the Oakland Raiders. Finished his Nevada career with 5,333 rushing yards, third in NCAA history, 
and his number 27 was subsequently retired by the Wolf Pack.
5. Nate Burleson (2000-02): Parlayed second team All American status by the AP, CNN/SI and the Sporting News into a 3rd round selection by the Minnesota Vikings. Had a breakout season in 2004 with 1,006 receiving yards and 9 TD’s while lining up with Randy Moss.
Honorable Mention: Charles Wright: AKA Papa Shango or the Godfather. Wright never made the NFL but had a memorable pro wrestling career and retired in 2002 from the WWE.
Scarlett Falls To 2nd Place
Scarlett Johansson is no longer the sexiest woman in the world. The Australian/New Zealand edition of FHM named 20-year old model/actress Keeley number one.
Johansson is now second to one in the eyes of a publication that caters to a country that was initially a prison colony for the British.
